pleatedjeans:

via

dajo42:

whenever somebody says like “so what did you do today?” just look off into the distance and say “the right thing”

twatswag:

i have to be funny because being hot is not an option

officialprostitute:

gaining followers at the speed of something going backwards

You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.
 Thích Nhất Hạnh (via purplebuddhaproject)

thorxndor:

I was sitting on my friends bed with her when she came out as gay

and I was looking through a Chinese food pamphlet

so I put it down, looked at her and said “I was going to suggest ordering food but I see now you’d prefer to eat out”

and I don’t think she’s ever really forgave me  

gayweeb:

leg day looks: hipster sailor scout

do you think my gym knows I’m gay

gayweeb:

leg day looks: hipster sailor scout

do you think my gym knows I’m gay

samtarly:

that wasn’t very ***flawless remix [feat. nicki minaj] of you

Cross me off your crush list.

slaycinder:

jpgay:

i hate when a more attractive person has a crush on the same person i do

It’s like performing in a talent show and finding out that Beyonce is going on before you

xcarolynnn:

cloudydayrealestate:

the satisfaction

One time in like 5th grade I had this teacher and she gave us all bottles of shit like this and told us to squeeze it all out and of course we were like fuck yeah and did it and then she said, “Now, try and shove it all back in the container.” Of course we all tried, and then stared at her confused as shit. When we all obviously gave up, she said, “In the moment, you were so consumed with what you were doing that you didn’t realize the mess you were making. Then, after it was so quickly and easily poured out, you realize it is impossible to put it all back in. Remember this for the rest of your lives when it comes to the words that come out of your mouth” and we were like 10 so we were like yeah ok whatever lady, but somehow to this day I think of it constantly.